random reflections.

Our baby boy is 19 days old today! My body is pretty much starting to feel like my own again, because thankfully I got my wound vac off today, thank God. That thing is heavy, and you have to carry it around all the time. Thankfully I haven't had an infection yet, and the wound is just barely open now. I am sure it will be expensive to have had that, but so worth it. the nurse told me it will probably run around 1k a day. Oy! In money matters we also received our first bills from the hospital, we are around 30k right now. it will be interesting to see the final total just for delivery, as well as for the entire pregnancy.

I know God will provide the money, but it does look like I will have to go back to work pretty quickly here. So sad! Its a blessing though we both work from home and have different hours, so we will only have to have a babysitter a few hours a day. I am trying to decide if it would be best to wait a little longer until I am fully healed. We have the money, but its in our retirement account. Hard to mentally make that leap and pull it out.

Elijah is a wonderful baby. He routinely sleeps 4-5 hours at night, last night he slept almost 6. He is a chunk! He nurses for awhile then eats 3 oz formula. I'm not sure if its the tongue tie, his appetite or my lack of milk, but no way could I nurse exclusively. I wish I could, formula is expensive!!!

I am kind of irritated people keep asking me how I like being a mom. I have been a mom since I married dan, a stepmom is just as valid, thank you very much :) Its just as valid as a foster mom, real mom etc. I can honestly say I don't love elijah any more than the other kids. Its different of course because he is more dependent and needs us more, but I love the other kids as much as I love him.